busker

Blue Skies Blighted

On completion, even *one* such maneuver will be hard enough.

Skylines round the world

Educational *and* visual ... and Hong Kong tops the chart!

Bobby Blotter 3/30

Two splendid examples in the Review Police Blotter

Zoomquilt

PC World's Steve Bass always good on new and cool tools.

Check out the last tip - Zoomquilt.

It takes fore-e-vah to open but once you're there, keep the mouse clicked and drag up or down to navigate.

Vera Drake

Pierce's Rule # 22 - a good one - When in doubt, review something.

I tend to stay clear of depressing subjects because the more skilled the treatment, the more involved I become. My emotions seem to tap from a single source which leaves me a bit drained for any real stuff. However, what with the buzz on this one, plus the fact that Mike Leigh always wrongfoots my preconceptions, *and* that the ladies at my local Silverscreen all expressed flattering interest in my opinion - I grabbed the first one off the shelf.

It's set in a 1950s north London which I do in fact dimly recall for its ration-bound days and spivvy Brylcreemed hairstyles outside the Saturday dance palais (as sported by son Sid). Also, that chirpy London friendliness that Leigh catches in his ear-perfect dialogue - or maybe it was everyone doing their improv / character-exploring thing that Leigh seems to midwife so expertly from his casts.

(Ghastly pun - and there's another one coming up - which I'm keeping in out of honesty to the language of my first reactions.)

First off, despite being English and knowing these characters and their speech, I'm probably the least balanced to pass objective comment because of the surges of nostalgic emotion that envelop me out of the blue and completely distract me from the minutiae of the plot.

Even the manufactured Evening Standard headline lending credence to a streetseller's cry of "Extra! Extra!".

Speaking of plot, one of the striking aspects of the story is Vera's matter-of-fact approach to her criminal sideline, made more shocking by the squalid surroundings in which she wields her lye soap and disinfectant.

By way of clever contrast, Leigh runs a parallel story of a girl of privileged background who also finds herself inconveniently pregnant but for whom the escape route is eminently smoother, via urbane Harley Street doc, equally unctuous psychiatrist, and a weekend's genial convalescence between the perfumed sheets of a nursing home somewhere in the country.

The next unfortunate phrase that occurred was the feeling of being 'back in the womb' - a silly enough expression anyway - as I watched the characters move and speak, recognizing and placing each one as precisely as Professor Higgins could slot an accent north or south of Kensington High Street.

I couldn't throw the feeling of being back in England - back in years, even - amid types I probably didn't remember I remembered until tapped by this subtle movie:

• Vera's snooty sister-in-law, encapsulating all the aspirations and middle class snobbery of those post-war days.
• The police, particularly Peter Wight as D.I. Webster
• Perhaps most historically accurate of all, the gentlemen of the Bench - barristers, magistrates, the judge - all in an exalted galaxy miles from any understanding by the humble Vera.

As for the talk of Imelda Staunton's award-winning portrayal, if *I* had put in a performance like that, I would certainly have nursed hopes of recognition beyond mere nomination.

Too near the knuckle, I guess, rather as some ramshackle sets are *so* convincing that people assume they were just there, as opposed to created from scratch by some genius designer.

To choose a moment from the movie, it has to be when the police finally turn up and confront Vera. The camera just fixes on her face. She says nothing, and you need to replay the scene to see the slow switches of emotion ... if I had been an Academician, that's where I would have been sorely torn, over that minute's footage alone.

After word

Well I never. Mike Leigh does it once again. I wonder if I'd have liked to have known this going into the movie or not:

• Except for Imelda Staunton, none of the actors knew that the film was about abortion. Each actors only knew what concerned their characters.
  • Wow! Just like Secrets and Lies where white mother and black daughter (Blethyn and Jean-Baptiste) had never been introduced prior to when they meet on screen. What a moment that must have been - that trickster, Leigh.
• The budget was so tight, a week of filming had to be cancelled.
• "Filmed with NO script, the film went on to be nominated for Best Original Screenplay." So much for my precious reference to "ear-perfect dialogue".

  Mike Leigh had to prepare the screenplay so it could be sent out to academy members, but actually the nominated screenplay never existed. The film itself was the screenplay.

• Leigh asked the actors to hum and, because they couldn't afford to buy rights to songs, the actors had to hum something generic.

Well, all that rather makes my own comments rather ill-informed and irrelevant.

// posted by Corfucius @ 12:32 pm (0) comments

Celebrity Voiceovers

Interesting Slate piece on how celebrities no longer regard voiceover work as infra dig.

I must listen more closely to the AOL spot and see if I can recognise Julia Roberts' velveteen tones.

Even *I* once did VO work - in Hong Kong on a brandy advert.

I was ghastly: they wanted Michael Caine and all I could deliver was Peter Sellers or David Niven.

X'd

Having treated myself to a weekend's blitz of Jamie Kennedy's X-ing practical jokes, I find myself walking around in a state of all-round suspicion. Even a passing cop car looked fake and I was preparing some suitably sceptical line in case he swung round on me and delivered some hardball line about my broken tail light.

Worst was trying to negotiate Safeway without calling the bluff on every helpful employee who asked if I'd found everything OK. Yerss, right, mate - not falling for *that* one!

Moral: a full season is a *trifle* more than a mature adult should be able to take at a single sitting, even tho' I interspersed the charades with the Sally Potter/Tilda Swinton Orlando and Robin Williams' Final Cut.

I must say that taking on a Kennedy marathon is made considerably easier by any recent work by Williams. He is a most sinister actor with a menacing screen presence that leaves me needing strong drink and frivolous companions - the perfect prep for watching the ebullient JK "X" the unsuspecting.

Kennedy is a very bright lad with a talent for accents and the most brilliant and extraordinary disguises that *ought* to win his crew 1st prizes across all categories. He also has a talent for creating original characters, such as odious fathers and greasy hoodlums - and not a bad line in oafish Brit rock stars.

Speaking of the odious father, the lad does not lack physical courage, such as when he plays the sports mad dad from hell and abuses his pretend (and very game) "son" in front of some pretty beefy (and increasingly riled) athletes. There are usually pals in on the joke so I assume they are ready to leap to Kennedy's defence if things get ugly.

I assume the Kennedy pranks are well known because of the number of victims who catch on so quickly at the dénouement when JK informs them that they have just been "exxed".

This brings me to a point about many of his japes, particularly those where a pal is being set up to be irked by some buffoon security police or waiter, or just the sexy Kathy Lee Gifford hitting on some innocent hunk and then leaving him with the bill for lunch as well as the champagne she originally sent over.

I remember reading in a critique of "Othello" (no less!) that there is a type of practical joke that leaves you knowing no more about the joker but a heck of a bit more about yourself. Some of the situations the Kennedy show dreams up are frankly incomprehensible to the point of cruelty - the mother who is led to believe her daughter is a strippper; the newcomer to Hollywood who is pushed around to accommodate a celebrity; the gentle sports giant who watches a young fan manhandled by an idiot dad.

All good fun, however - and the local TV Interviewer deserves an Oscar for the straight face he maintains while interviewing the Kennedy *parents* as well as a "hot mum" of one of this friends.

Easter Charade

That Chris Hitchens is such as bad boy, but he keeps my own writing on the straight and narrow so I have to keep reading him.

Thanks, too, to Ars Technica for trying to remove the circus element.

In fact, I was only checking the sayings of Chairman Hitch to confirm gloomy predictions that, despite 10 days without food/water *and* her feeding tube removed etc, the hapless Mrs Schiavo's demise is still not predicted for another *week* or two. Surely that can't be right? Lord, the body puts up a fight!

Speaking of Le Bon Dieu, His patience is clearly running thin over the Schiavo shenanigans because look at the 8.7 tremblor He's just visited on Sumatra, as if to remind us that if we can't come up with some adult headlines of our own, He will gladly provide.

I must say, not a good time for the Pope to go less than monosyllabic: I wouldn't have minded hearing what's up with our Maker timing these seismic tantrums to key dates on the religious calendar.

I trust this isn't a hint to speed up that extreme makeover on Ark II or for extra doorway daubing come Passover ...

Whoops - here it is in the Koran for the year of Our Lord 2007, Tsunami USA

Green Card ID and Password

I'm in the process of E-Filing my renewal application to extend my Green Card and am having fun choosing a password.

The instructions are clear:

User ID:

• Must contain between 6 to 16 alpha-numeric characters;
• Must contain no spaces;
• Is case sensitive

Password

• Must contain 8 to 16 alpha-numeric characters;
• Is case sensitive;
• Must contain *at least* 2 of the following 3 types of characters
  • Upper case alphabetic;
  • Lower case alphabetic;
  • Numeric
• Must contact *at least* 1 special character
  • @ # $ % ^ & * = +
• Must begin and end with an alphabetic character
• Cannot contain or use
  • Spaces;
  • All or part of your User ID;
  • 2 identical characters consecutively (e.g. "gg" or "66")
• Examples of Passwords: Twink<1959k or StarWars=4ever

"How to Blog"

They're no doubt labeled "arrogance issues" in this country but no matter how low I humble down, I find it hugely difficult to extract anything helpful from most "how-to-write" advice. The exceptions are the likes of George V. Higgins.

But Tony Pierce has two points that caught my eye, particularly #27 about poetry.

Even as I posted my own undistinguished effort for the San Carlos poetry gathering, I had that uneasy feeling that all was not right. But it's interesting to read it from someone like Pierce and have my thoughts clarified and convictions emboldened:

# 18. "Before you hit Save as Draft or Publish Post, select all and copy your masterpiece. You are using a computer and the internet, shit can happen. No need to lose a good post."

# 27. "Nobody likes poems. Don't put your poems on your blog. Not even if they're incredible. Especially if they're incredible. Odds are they're not incredible. Bad poems are funny sometimes though, so fine, put your dumb poems on there. Whatever."

I should get out more.

I only found out about TP's standing in the community after following a promising-sounding link about anonymous comments to what turned out to be a disconcertingly intemperate - and casually edited, IMO - broadside by none other than our Antoine.

I suppose this too should be branded cowardly anonymous commentary for being an in-blog ponder on how far from reproach ones own efforts need be before setting about guiding others.

Post-script 2: Feedback! Two polite comments, including nice note from TP

"im always amazed by people who only read the first half of that rule and not that latter half

http://www.tonypierce.com/ilka/stove.htm

gen x, baby"

Good interview on NPR's "On the Media" that makes me want to read more from this lady.

Engineering Magic

The more you know about engineering, the more you’ll know about magic.

Nice little site, including:

• Disappearing milk;
• Piercing a balloon;
• Floating dollar
• Milk pitcher
• Playing card
• Egg in a bottle

Easter Egg Archive

Cool interview about digital Easter eggs by All Things Considered's Debbie Elliott with David Wolf, who maintains the site, documenting surprise content in DVDs, computer software and games.

Good subject to bring up at the next Seattle Weblogger Meetup Group.

Made me think of the blogging iBooked Jake from the Seattle Meeting. I bet *he* knows all the best oeufs.

Equestrienne Spring Break

#1 daughter canters into Spring, taking a breather from her thesis on "Loose Canons: Nuances of diffidence in 12th century heretical thought."

Phew! In my day among the dreamy spires, one could at least understand the *title*.

I think my best was "Crack your cheeks: the role of weather in King Lear"

Goat buster

KRL Online Services

Run-don't-walk contribution by Ref Librarian Julie O'Neill, page 11, BI Library News: "Search for articles at home the easy way".

• Kitsap Regional Library (KRL) subscribes to online services, free, also accessible from home or at the excellent library
• Proquest Mags and Rags
• InfoTrac OneFile
• NYT Historical
• Link here
• In left menu, click "Search Electronic Resources"
• From the list, choose database
• Further help: Info' Desk at the Library itself, (206) 842-4162

US version of The Office

But nil desperandum, later efforts are promised to be more original and palatable, i.e. less slavish to the original brilliant Beeb version.

• No need my opinion. Slate nails the March 24 grotesquerie in one.
• It can't get worse - well, it can, and I could script a devastating parody - but the barely Merkanised script from the Brit version was as ash in the mouths of the hapless US cast who might as well have been spouting Swahili for all the understanding or feeling they brought to the imposed foreign dialog.
• My misgivings are that the cast are identikit characters with none of the verbal or physical originality that distinguished the hit version.
• The core idea of trying to contort the original into American was a misbegotten one which is why the carpentry of the show creaks so loudly and makes amateurs of the entire cast.
• Such abortive beginnings can be hard to recover from and my guess is that most of the NBC audience will end up wondering what the heck the fuss was all about.
• If this leads to good British shows being left alone, the sacrilege will have been worth it.
• I know this version has been bought for inflicting back on the UK market. I don't have dates but will report back with the reaction(s) from the boroughs and shires.

Back to the US version, it will have to change out of all recognition to be remotely acceptable.

Euromail vs Amerimail

Another good piece in Slate about something of which I've been aware ever since my Euro kith and kin emerged from the mists of Esterbrook and vellum into a vague state of wiredness.

To quote:

"North America and Europe are two continents divided by a common technology: e-mail ... two distinct forms of e-mail have emerged: Euromail and Amerimail.

Amerimail is informal and chatty, likely to begin with a breezy "Hi" and end with a "Bye" ... Americans are reluctant to dive into the meat of an e-mail; Amerimail is a bundle of contradictions: rambling and yet direct; deferential, yet arrogant. In other words, Amerimail is America.

Euromail is stiff and cold, often beginning with a formal "Dear Mr. X" and ending with a brusque "Sincerely." You won't find any mention of kids or the weather or jellyfish in Euromail. It's all business. It's also slow. Your correspondent might take days, even weeks, to answer a message. Euromail is also less confrontational in tone, rarely filled with the overt nastiness that characterizes American e-mail disagreements."

Fun to read in full.

"bainbridge buzz"

Non-Bainbridge pals expect me to keep them au fait with latest BI links.

Here's a new-ish one that I've not thoroughly sussed out. On the other hand, if I waited 'til I had anything sensible to say on a subject before posting, *very* little would get written.

To boot, I would probably jack the whole bloggie thing in from sheer crashing boredom of staying accurate, informative or truthful.

Harbor Square

• "Leisurely stroll. Vibrant charm. Quaint sophistication."
• Ace BI Review exposé of some intended "Harbor Square" development.
• Ground-breaking around Ferncliffe timed for August
• Incisive and humorous Op-Ed
• Colorful info-package including hilarious mini-movie plugging down-to-earth "island hamlet" lifestyle.
  • Caveat: Needs Flash media but worth the tedium for the giggle.
  • Ironic prominence given to cosy island fixture, Winslow Hardware: one of the very businesses biting the dust for *lack* of community spirit that this mendacious flick purports to portray.
  • Fun working out the couple's tortuous route home after their ferry commute
  • Saving Factor #1: Nice sexy model for the wife. Reminds me of Barbara Hershey
• Farcical video or not, this Harbor Square hoo-hah is good ink for local journos *and* good link to JL's sage musings on the thorny subject of Community Life on the Island, in turn pointing to Kevin Briody's support comment.
• Factor #2 ~ the spelling of 'Harbor'.
  • At least we're saved pretensions to any upmarket poshness using Britisher spelling of 'HarboUr'

Sparing 'n' Spoiling

Interesting NPR news item about Scott McConnell, in hot water with Syracuse's Le Moyne College for advocating corporal punishment in a paper he wrote as a student. The college dismissed him.

Others who covered it (and I trust there'll be more):

Farmers Almanac - online

Bless the internet: Old Farmers Alamanac avail for consulting online.

San Carlos Encountered

Mr Tidy

As far as I'm concerned, *all* writing is a work in progress and there's always something that can be tidied somewhere.

For my own writing, the first words I slap down are of little interest except as guidelines to where I may want to go. Akin to a slap of marble or a block of wood: all one is really looking at is the material one has to work with. The finished product will bear little resemblance.

I am a terrible editor. In fact I am *not* an editor of any sort or skill so much as a rewriter, which I regard as pretty low life and not something to be mentioned around polite company.

But I have posed as an editor on three continents and my business cards have often proclaimed me as such.

When I was in Hong Kong, scrabbling as a despised writer/editor for one of the hotshot American ad agencies, I was part of a team on an account with a very tough and difficult client - and none come tougher or more difficult than tough difficult Americans straight out of Central Casting. I think that's part of the whole MBA training deal, or just before they've given their corner office and key to the exc loo, they go off to some secret mountain fortress where they're trained in how to bust balls.

Like all toughies, this one would tear anything we wrote apart and keep tearing til blueprint stage and even when the final job was printing. Because his roar was every bit as ferocious as his bite, we took it and met deadlines best we could.

One job was going so badly, we almost felt like jacking it in and suggesting he find another agency. It had gone thru umpteen writers including the boss man and his assistant and probably his glam trophy wife who'd wander in now and then festooned with shopping.

One night late at the printers, I was brought a brochure that had corrections even the skilled Chinese typesetter couldn't decipher. The job had to be done by the next morning and I was asked my advice. I looked at this hardworking guy who'd given up his nights and weekends and I said, "You know, Kenny? Who *cares* what the corrections say? I'm going to sit down and write the whole thing the way it should be. I don't want to see the proof. It's shapeless rubbish."

So I wrote the whole thing and signed off on it and it printed and we delivered it to the client's office and I went home for my 4 hours' sleep before the big meeting.

Naturally, the creative director went ashen when he saw it and told me that I was carrying the can and any reprint came out of my pay.

The big cheese came in and looked it over and barked some orders and pretended to spot some color defect and queried a wrong phone number; the usual.

He then asked about the writing and the CD did his thing and dumped me in it, to which I murmered something craven like I thought it could do with some tidying here and there. He grunted.

A half hour later as he walked out and we all rose and bowed and scraped, he pointed at me:

"You, my English friend - you tidy up good"

Ever after, each time some expensive writer had done his job, whether I'd been allowed near it or not, the CEO would jab a finger at me and growl, "You seen this, Mr Tidy? This got your seal of approval?" I'd nod and simper and tug forelock.

I do tidy up good.

I'm reminded of this by the two versions of my Weblogger Meeting report:

San Carlos Encounter

Am getting worried.

I have this "effort" for Karen-Jo which will never see light of day except at this San Carlos reading, but I can't work it into anything remotely worthwhile.

San Carlos Encounter

"Do you remember me barging out the Carlos back door? ... "

Blah blah, etc - that's enough. Rest of poem safely between <!-- and -->, thanks to the one of two points to catch my eye in Tony Pierce's energetic musings on How to Blog was item 27:

"Nobody likes poems. dont put your poems on your blog. not even if theyre incredible. especially if theyre incredible. odds are theyre not incredible. bad poems are funny sometimes though, so fine, put your dumb poems on there. whatever."

Yet no' sae auld, and no' sae stiff

matrix redux

Ian McEwan

Morning, March 19, wake to familar Brit voice on radio 94.0FM

Jerry Springer for UK TV - but no brawling

Say whut?

"No brawling in the aisles when Jerry Springer brings his famously volatile confessional TV show to the UK - a domestic version of the US talk show that made his name:

"We're not going to go down the line of fighting, swearing and shouting. There is another side to Jerry - he's a very good and sensitive interviewer," said Dianne Nelmes, director of daytime and lifestyle at Granada."

Good God, woman!

"Another side to Jerry? Good and sensitive interviewer?"

Who on earth wants *that*? Why on earth do you think anyone tunes into the rubbish in the first place?

Blimey - poor blair-ified Brits: first they get a cocked-up yankified version of The Office sold *back* to them; now they're fobbed off with this neutered Springer nonsense.

Speaking of the Gervais triumph - and I hate being such a milksop (advancing senility, no doubt) - I have to own up to coming across a qualifying reference to the US 'Office' version that makes me hold fire until I've seen the travesty itself.

At least I will take satisfaction in pouring even more venomous bile on the show if my initial pompous objections are proved founded.

In the meantime, I chafe in the hateful situation of pretending to "play fair". A passing phase, I assure you.

Infraction

My far from minor Minol utilities statement is in and exactly what I foretold has happened.

First, refresher links to earlier postings on the subject:

• November 2004
• Jan 2005
• And a wrung dry piece from The Stranger archives

So ...

Deadwood ~ the music

Track 6, "Go to hell"

Wild Bill Hickok (Carradine, superb) to Charlie Utter (perfectly cast Dayton Callie):

"I don't wanna fight it no more ... I don't want you p****ng in my ear about it ... Can you let me go to hell the way I want to?"

C: "Yeh, I can do that"

"Yeh, I can do that"

13 Things That Do Not Make Sense

Among the 13:

Weblogger Meetup

As always for such first-time occasions, I arrived early and anonymous and sat quietly seeing if I could spot my fellow blogsters. This being my first Seattle Weblogger Meetup, I was nervous as hell, and eyeing the door in case a sudden wave of decisiveness would enable me to walk out and catch the 7:30 ferry home with no damage done.

Bug-Me-Not

I have a feeling that wise pals will write in with good reasons why I should *not* use BugMeNot.

Alas, it *sounds* neat and I'm the sort of sucker - spoiled by years of blanket access - to be irritated when asked to register and fall for links like this.

• I'm browsing and click a link that asks me to login or register.
• I turn to BugMeNot.
• I note the website address I'm trying to access.
• I visit the BMN address, enter the address I'm after and press the "Show Logins" button
• If it's working, I'm looking at a username and password.
• I return to the site I'm interested in and login with the username and password I've just noted.
• Again, if it's working, I should be looking at my article
• Nota bene:All username/password accounts listed on BugMeNot are added by users. If I *can't* find a working login for a site, I'm encouraged as a nice BugMeNot buddy to register (fake details) with that site and help the next person.

Beeb report on Best Blogs

I thought I'd seen all these Bloggies results before but it must be just my Alzheimer turning telepathic.

Anyway, Heather Armstrong needs no intro for her Dooce and I can't remember how or why I've known of Plastic Bag before this award.

Uncover the Net

Fun stuff

• Mission: organize web's content into comprehensive categorized links and articles by pros in their field.
• Comprise powerful directory with a database of over 14,000,000 pages
• Free articles + Webmaster forums.
• UTN Directory (only directory to be a member and sponsor of WWW Consortium).

Happy searching

Speed Typing Test

We all fancy ourselves as swift and nifty on the keyboard.

All that practice we get on the fun stuff?

• Emailing
• IM-ing
• Blogging
• Just plain ol' surfing

But how fast are we really?

Take this cool test and see ...

If you're less than impressed with yourself, CalculatorCat also has Software Recommendations

If you couldn't care less how fast you type, you're probably relaxed enough to enjoy some of the free calculators:

• Body Mass
• Airport Distances
• Wind Chill
• My Excel favorite: the Difference *between* Dates

Silky Solution ~ The Gods not mocked

I was boasting the other day about my success in shifting unwanted CDs via Amazon's Marketplace and included an experience that gives blogging its good name.

"So why haven't you shared this *in* your blog?" I was asked.

Good question.

• The album I'd listed was the incomparable Yo Yo Ma's masterpiece collaboration on Silk Road
• Almost immediately, one of my fave blogees - I'll call her Miranda - mailed me expressing interest, so I offered to let her hear it first before committing
• Being one of those arrogant types who makes free with using tradespersons to handle simple errands, I told Miranda I'd leave the album with our local grocer and set about making the arrangements.
• Despite some managerial faffing and puffing about not wanting to take responsibility etc, I persevered in my insistence that I had every confidence in the staff's ability to handle this simple transaction. Having contributed generously to the manager's wages over the years, I was not to be nay-said
• Anyway, it wasn't Mister Manager who'd be handling the task, so, I placed the package with a trusted employee and thought nothing more.
• Ahem - everything possible went wrong and Miranda's and my email in-box bulged with apologies and queries, each of us taking blame for the failure to connect
• Now, Miranda and I had only really 'knew' each other via email and our blogs and real-life hassles are not the sort of strain to place on such 'relationships', so I was getting a bit leery about Sods Law placing this strain on what should have been a very straightforward operation.
• If getting the CD to her to test was this hard, Lord knows how we'd fare if she a) didn't like it and needed to hand it back b) *did* like it and needed to get me payment
• After a final mix-up, I was suggesting Plan B when lo! M mailed me that she'd in fact got the package safely
• Now get this: after all the toing and froing, she obviously felt it only polite to give me some background
  • She was a fan of Ma's
  • It was her *birthday week
• Miracle solution! Of course, like it or not, Miranda should have it as a birthday gift and by way of appreciation of all the pleasure *I* had got from her blog.
• Is that not the gods moving in mysterious ways? I think so.
• Long live the web, long live birthdays

Is that not a perfect encapsulation of blog power?

Jostle, provoke, shift ...

As March 20th's San Carlos Poetry Slam looms, what perfect timing for the alluring Camille Paglia's excellent piece on Why Poetry Matters

Steel in the Spine

One country two systems - or nothing

The people of Hong Kong are not mocked in their resolute stance on democracy.

Ineffectual Chief Exec Tung Chee-hwa failed to grasp the simple fact that Hong Kong's people *will* choose their own government.

Two major stars in the journalistic firmament file informative pieces in the International Herald Tribune

Islay Riler

I've already commented in exceedingly surly and un-islanderly fashion on the awful *look* of the piece

Islay Smiley

What an incident-packed week, as covered in the 12th March BI Review.

Hard to choose the burning issue du jour from all the fiery goings on:

• Art Soup starved out?
• Winslow Hardware closing?
• Harbor Commissioner Paul Svornich plumbing new depths of idiotic pronouncements on racing shells?
• Gary Pettersen blaming cars not tourists for downtown Winslow gridlock?
• Ball-point vandalising of the internment memorial display?

None of those, actually.

Clear winner is the bizarre "message" to the Island from the incongruously kilted kitchen of "The" Islay Manor.

One picture tells all: gaze in bemused horror on the sheer clunky affectation of that 'scroll', surpassing kitschness, even by our Bainbridge standards

Och - one canna help wondering why some canny soul down in the Review's advertising dept couldn't have just picked up a phone and saved them going quite so aglae in their choice of design malfunction.

Hoots! What's it even meant to be?

Gandhi

House of Exotic Indian Cuisine

Thursday was so glorious, for luncheon I decided to treat myself to Indian cuisine - from the Punjab, no less - at the newly opened Gandhi on the second floor of the Pavilion.

None other than the dapper manager Mr Manoj Kumar himself led me to my table, tho' I blanched when I saw where he was placing me. Let me explain:

Many moons ago, I decided to explore somewhere to take business contacts for a good meal and away from the Seattle smog.

Despite the silly name, I decided to put "Spartans" Italian restaurant (as it was called in those days) thru its paces. Thus it was one evening that I found myself climbing the stairs to the same 2nd-floor rendezvous now occupied by Gandhi.

Matters got off to a splendid start with the dazzling smile I got from the stunning young receptionist - clearly a sophisticated import from the fleshpots of Seattle. In fact, once I could tear my eyes off her, I noticed that almost the *entire* staff comprised of damsels of serious pulchritude.

Before I could ogle further, up strode the manager (an acquaintance, as it happened) and led me to a table discreetly hidden from the fray and offered me a glass of wine and the menu.

Five minutes passed, fifteen, then 20 ... I was puzzled. Meanwhile, from the other side of the partition I could hear the manager keeping his bevy of beauties amused in trills of youthful laughter.

But what about my vino and the menu?

Another 10 minutes passed, at which point I decided to humiliate myself no longer and walked out, attracting no one's attention, certainly not the manager's whom I glimpsed besporting himself on the balcony with a brace of ringleted serveuses.

Why wait so long? Well, I'll tell you why - to enjoy a meal served by one of those leggy charmers, that's why. Otherwise I'd have vamoosed much sooner.

Anyway, it was to that exact same table that Mr Kumar led me - but for a very different experience.

A menu was instantly in my hands, the drink arrived - a deliciously cold Kingfisher - and I was off:

• Papadums
• Paratha
• Chicken tikka
• Rice
• Raita
• Mango chutney

Only one blemish - rather funny, really - concerning the nectar Kingfisher. It comes in rather a *small* bottle, so a good meal usually requires two or three. Imagine my horror (and Mr Kumar's!) when I called for the second bottle only to be told that I had consumed the last Kingfisher - the man who drank Gandhi dry! - and would need to fall back on Heineken.

I began to wonder if that particular area wasn't jinxed: first, the service-unconscious Spartan harem; next the oddly named "Via" (where my daughter and I had possibly our worst - and worst *served* - meal *ever* on the island.

And now an ale malfunction for Gandhi ... ominous.

I fear for this fine establishment's chances of survival (elaborated on in a long and pompous discussion of that woeful Islay advert/bleat (BI Review, March 12; with the kinky hideous pseudo scroll border).

Having finished my meal, and strolled out onto the balcony for fresh air, sunshine and a contemplative (and contented) digestif
Cohiba, I settled the bill (a very reasonable $35 incl not ungenerous tip) and sauntered home.

I urge all lovers of exotic Indian cuisine to hurry there before the Gandhi bites the dust, victim to our collective and characteristic neglect, as per Artsoup and the revered Winslow Hardware.

The Office - US-style

On your behalf, I have been scrutinizing video clips of the US version of The Office.

On our screens March 24th, it is a travesty through and through.

A Day at the Seattle Aquarium

On a gorgeous day, what is more enjoyable than the sort of free ferry trip that overseas visitors pay thru the nose for, then a brisk stroll down the piers, past the tourist traps and the alluring aroma of Ivar's fish 'n' chips - et voilà! Our very own Seattle Aquarium - within easier traveling distance for Bainbridgers than the hapless Seattle-siders who have to battle public transport and/or parking.

Of course, it's visits like this that remind me that my toy-town camera is a false economy when it fails to deliver the true glorious color of those on display, or lacks the speed to capture a mother otter cruising with her babe.

Those graceful seals, just gliding thru the water - upside down, to boot.

It brings home what a marvel Mother Nature is - *and* The Great Designer - steamlining them to pass *within* the water as if part of it, rather than thru it, like us clunky humans.

The Aquarium's own site has pics and a ton of information that it's worth genning up on beforehand.

Speaking of which, the place is gloriously full of children and plenty of chances for our own darlings to inter-act with others, either at that velcro board or the upstairs Grotto by the seals.

Hey parents! This is a real chance for our kids to learn, and they look to us as omniscient sources of all information.

Instead, I see fathers shambling around, peering with the same child-like enthusiasm as their offspring, but answering "Dunno ... dunno ... gee, that's a good question ... er, dunno."

A lot of the answers are in the Exhibit Guide and it's fun for us to learn, too.

Feeding time at the Aquarium.

Deadwood 2nd series

First page it tauntingly falls open at is this double page spread for season 2 of the best viewing on TV. Yes, even better than Trump, and I haven't seen whatever the fragrant Martha Stewart comes up with.

Seriously, I can only echo Sedition's rallying call

"If you’re an adult, watch this show.

The 2nd season starts Sunday night, 6 March 2005. Don’t let this show disappear.

Don’t even give them a reason to consider cutting its budget."

Full throttle frontier America

I know the second Deadwood series started March 6 - and I'm consumed with jealousy of those with HBO - but I'm still plugging the first one as viewable on DVD.

Costly petard - $37.7 million

Boeing CEO Harry Stonecipher was the upstanding guy who brought *in* the higher standards of personal behavior, moral etc.

Now he himself is hoist with his own petard as he resigns over an affair with a fellow employee - said to be 48-year-old divorced exec Debra Peabody.

Stonecipher will receive a $2.1 million bonus based on the company's financial performance in 2004.

But ... he won't get performance shares of the company stock that could have been worth as much as $37.7 million.

Phew - that was a costly round of 'body' shots behind the filing cabinets.

I trust Mr Stonecipher found Ms Peabody's body worth it.

Riveting, bizarre, spooky. Utterly convincing, and the multi-cast commentary is even more sinister

Werner Herzog is the perfect subject here:

Any spoil-sport who blabs the gaff on this totally beguiling documentary deserves a flogging and *then* to be tossed into the chilly Loch waters.

Speaking of which, major salute to the charming Kitana Baker, who actually *did* plunge as part of her duties as Discover IV's sonar operator ... brrrave lass.

I knew absolutely nothing about the movie, nor am I in any way curious about what does or does not trawl the waters of Loch Ness. But the combination of Nessie *and* the principled Herr Herzog was not to be resisted, and how right I was.

A very long time since I've been so intrigued ... from the start, you *know* it's heading for a Murphy's Law field day and all you can do is watch the whole train wreck of a movie gather pace.

What grand guignol serendipity for the documentary film crew to have chosen *this* of all projects to follow Werner around on.

Any Old Iron?

You know the sequence:

• Pen-pusher saves shekels to move to rural Bainbridge where he discovers Winslow Hardware (RIP) *and* Bay Hay & Feed
• Kits self out with manly gear and adds bowlegged equestrian roll to previously wimpish waddle.
• Buys a big ol'SUV to negotiate the gulches and gullies of their outback estate.

• Unused unopened Craftsman Random Orbit Sander
• Palm grip housing.
• 5" diameter pad
  
• Pre-punched adhesive backed discs, ideal for flat or curved surfaces
• 13,000 OPM
• Counterbalanced, lightweight design
• Full spin control feature with sealed slide switch
• Three packs (total 13) of sanding discs (43 x heavy duty, 5 x lite) which I'm throwing in free.
• An equally unused "American Camper" single burner propane stove
• No less than *two* 16.4 oz bottles of Coleman propane fuel
• A 32 oz can of KS-3 Premium Stripper (which I'm going to chuck in with whichever item sells first)
• A 1-quart can of Minwax® fast-drying polyurethane clear satin wood finish stain (ditto buckshee bonus gift to purchaser of sander or stove