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Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Green Card

OK. To all my pals who've been urging me for the sake of my un-renewed Green Card to go easy on the peddy-gogy and t'inking I taw a bella figure peddy-tat.

Great news!

green card1My card is in, and very handsome it is, too.

Much more official looking than the sissy pink old one.

Note, too, that I'm now a Permanent  resident and not just a pathetic residentializing 'Alien'.

You wouldn't believe the snide chuckles that attracted, altho' in its defence I have to say that a pitying traffic cop was once so amused by the wording and my John Cleesian accent that he handed the card back with an:

"I always thought you guys were outta left field but I didn't know it was official.

OK, move on Mr Holmes, and remember that in this country we drive on the *left* hand side-"

"You mean the *right* side, officer?"

"What'd I just say? Heck, now you've got me at it ...."

mirrored green cardVery weird reverse side: it has the 'Permanent Resident Card' titling, and then just a completely reflective surface, ideal for helio-graphing passing planes when stranded on that desert island.

Ideal for that blond joke I recently got rapped over the knuckles for circulating to my fiercer feminist pals:

Blond is pulled over by equally blond cop. Fumbles for licence, but has to ask what it looks like.

Is told its dimensions at which she pulls out a small vanity mirror and proffers it up.

Blond cop gives it a glance and hands it back, "Uh, ok, didn't realize you were a cop."
I wonder what my chances would be with the next burly airport official to check me out, if I waited til he'd inspected the reverse side and then piped up, "Bet you never guessed I was an Immigration officer, too!"

Speaking of Peddy-morphism, lots of lovely examples from you, including

  • Pedicle
  • Peduncle
  • Pedology
  • And some interesting meanings of peddee from olden times
    • Pedee/Peddee: a serving-lad, footboy, groom
    • Blount (1661) "Who can blame Dolon, a poor Pedee, for adventuring his life for Gold" (Gosh, a little near the knuckle)
    • Phillips (17706) An ordinary foot-boy, a drudge: "What, must I be your Peddee upon all occasions?"
    • Tyneside Songs (1863): Wor blagaired lad, the young Pedee
    • Heslop (1894): The crew of a keel consisted of the skipper, two bullies, and the pedd-ee

    To be strictly fair and funny, I'm more on the lookout for *double*-'d' variations, altho' I break my own rule left and right. My privilege.


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